1 White Person Dies In Avalanche. And 432 Others.

Tragic news from Pakistan, as an avalanche on K2, has claimed the life of a white person. And some other non-white people.

“It’s obviously very saddening,” said Australia’s Ambassador to Pakistan, Steve Gifred. “I’m not sure who he was or where he came from, but to lose a white person is a tragedy beyond comprehension.”

The major news networks echoed the sentiment, with 24 hour coverage of the disaster zone, and outpourings of grief for the white person, who is yet to be identified.

“We’ll find him,” said rescuer Jenny Tribly, digging through non-white bodies. “It would be much easier if we didn’t have all these brown people in the way, but when there’s a white person dead, we won’t stop until he’s home returned to, wherever he’s from.”

Reporters are also battling horrendous conditions to bring this story to the world, Fox News Correspondent, Craig Havemore explains. “Everywhere we go, there are hundreds of non-white people, crying and wailing. It’s incredibly frustrating when you’re trying to film the mountainside, in an attempt to show the sheer latent power of nature, and then some brown person steps into the shot, trying to find his family.”

A charity line has been set up for the white person.

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