PM Grumpy-Pants, Treasurer Sent To Timeout

Malcolm Turnbull, has responded to news of his plunging popularity, with the maturity and pragmatism expected of a world leader.
“I don’t care,” said Turnbull to a group of reporters, as he prepared to be sworn in as Australia’s 45th Prime Minister. “Polls are silly, and you guys are all stupid heads.” He then covered his ears with his hands and hummed loudly.
Treasurer Scott Morrison supported the Prime Minister’s bold stance by poking his tongue out and laughing loudly, before becoming distracted and rolling his tongue over. “Can you guys do this?” He asked.
Opposition leader Bill Shorten, responded by saying this was indicative of a new breed of Liberal politics, which prioritises media stunts over solid policy.
“Scott Morrison learned that trick from me. I told the Governor General, and he said I could show everyone the tongue trick.” He then made the uncharacteristic decision of announcing policy on the fly.
“I’m telling on Scott,” said Shorten, ending the press conference and storming toward Governor General Sir Peter Cosgrove’s residence.
Latest reports have Scott Morrison in a timeout, and Shorten in his office, playing quietly, thinking about his actions.

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