Donald Trump Congratulates Leonardo DaVinci for Selling Painting

Donald Trump, President of the United States and art lover, has congratulated renaissance artist Leonardo DaVinci for selling his painting 'Salvator Mundi' for $450million. "He's doing great things," said Trump. "We're very proud of this man who continues to go above and beyond in his field; reminds me of that Frederick Douglass chap." Trump, not usually … Continue reading Donald Trump Congratulates Leonardo DaVinci for Selling Painting

Trump Apologises for People Misunderstanding Him

United States President Donald Trump has apologised to the widow of a fallen US soldier during a press conference in Phoenix, Arizona. When asked if he regrets suggesting Myeshia Johnson was lying with her claims that Trump forgot her husband's name and told her that 'he knew what he was getting himself in for, but … Continue reading Trump Apologises for People Misunderstanding Him

Mexico Responds To Trump’s Hardline

Mexican President, Enrique Peña Nieto, has responded to Donald Trump's reassertion that the Mexico will be responsible for payment of a new border wall by presenting a counteroffer. "Donald Trump looks at the Mexican people as all racists do; by using narrow-minded stereotypes," he said, adjusting his sombrero and taking a sip of tequila. "But … Continue reading Mexico Responds To Trump’s Hardline

Trump To Stop Speaking To Reduce Misquotes

Donald Trump has announced he is tired of being misquoted in the media, and will no longer speak out loud. Instead, he will stare at people and they can imagine what he's saying and clap loudly. At what will be presumably his last press conference that needs a microphone, Trump said, "I am sick, and … Continue reading Trump To Stop Speaking To Reduce Misquotes

Nazi Returns From Grave To Disown Trump

Berlin residents were surprised yesterday at the return of former Nazi Minister of Propaganda, Joseph Goebbels. Slightly charred, and a bit ripe having died over 80 years ago, Goebbels addressed a gathering of right-wing extremists. "I've taken time out from endless torments in the pits of hell, to address an injustice," said Dr Goebbels, holding … Continue reading Nazi Returns From Grave To Disown Trump